Halloween

We get to dress up at the office for Halloween. Here are some pictures.

Rese - The Old lady/Tourist

Michelle as Little Dead Riding Hood - she won the grand prize

Seth as God's Gift to Women

Rob - People's Choice winner - And our new moto - If you don't have PureSafety, You're Already Screwed.

Sebastian & Candice

Nick & Allison

Karissa as Marther Frickin' Stewart, Me as The Crazy Cat Lady, Shannon and Lily and Dorthy as Toto, Susan as Amy Winehouse

Sebastian as a workout girl

Catherine as Richard Simmons

Wicked Jealous

Emma passed this on - it's funny even if you're not a Pats/Sox fan or Catholic.

Jealous God Jealous of Sawx and Pats, Claims Douchey Boston Priest


Boston priest Tommy O’Connell focused his homily this week at his North Street church on Exodus 20:5 – “For I the Lord thy God am a jealous God” – explaining to his parishioners that God, like everyone outside of New England, is totally wicked jealous of the Red Sox and Patriots.

“I am asked all the time about that passage,” said Father O’Connell. “People wonder how a kind and merciful God can be jealous. Well, you’ve seen the Pats and Sox. If you rooted for crappy team like the Saints and Angels and Notre Dame, wouldn’t you be jealous of the Pats and Sox, too? God is no different. Everyone, even the Creator, wishes they were as wicked awesome as us.”

O’Connell told his flock that they should seek out examples of God in their everyday life so they can live more spiritually.

“Here in Boston those signs are all around us,” said O’Connell. “Are you telling me that God in coach form is not Bill Belichick? That God in quarterback form is not Tom Brady? Think about it. Brady dumped that actress and then she suddenly gets pregnant. That’s immaculate conception if I’ve ever seen it, that gold-digging harlot.”

Father O’Connell’s flock said his homily was the greatest, most powerful and most relevant they have ever heard.

“Usually I just kind of show up at mass every week and doze, knowing that if I don’t show up every week God will send me to hell for eternity,” said parishioner Donny Flannery. “But Father really had some good stuff this week. When he said that Satan sucks just like the Yankees suck, that really hit home with me. The Yankees do suck. I wonder if Satan is a homo just like Peyton Manning. Maybe he will address that in next Sunday’s homily. Wow – for the first time ever, I can’t wait to come back to church!”

Parishioner Shonda McGrath said she has noticed that jealous people try to criticize the Patriots and Red Sox just like they do the Catholic Church.

“So the Red Sox buy championships. So Bill Belichick cheats a little bit,” said McGrath. “Big whoop. Stop whining and complaining. It’s not like they’re out there touching kids or anything.”

Father O’Connell ended his homily by urging those in attendance to get right with God before it is too late.

“If you think God is jealous now,” said O’Connell. “Just wait until the Celtics win the NBA title this summer – and you’re retahded if you don’t think it’s going to happen. He’ll be so jealous He’ll probably start the Apocalypse.”

Saturday in the Park....

Me & my kicks

Friday night w/ Kory & Andy

All pics (except for the bull riding pics) courtesy of Andy's camera phone.

Rufus

Trees circa the back porch

Cadi at the Cadillac Ranch

Me trying to pool it

It's in the way that you use it...and I so don't know how when it comes to pool

Andy gets the prize for being the bravest!
Three seconds on the baddest bull in Nashvegas

I'm so hip and trendy I can hardly stand myself

Background info:

1. I took the Real Age test yesterday and it said my real age was 43. I almost died and decided I need to get with the program and start eating better, exercising, taking vitamins, and all that sort of crap I hate so that I can be as young on the inside as I look on the outside. Not vain or arrogant here folks - just honest. ;)


2. I have been looking for an actual hair style my whole life. Something other than poofy, puffy, flat, sorta curly, blah crap blah. I would never consider my hair a style and it frustrates me.


3. I'm approaching 35 and when we went to the 80's party a few weekends ago I realized just how young the 20 somethings are and just how close to 35 I am. (not that I'm complaining b/c I like my age and where I'm at in life but really I'm not 21 anymore - no where close.)

So add these things up and maybe I have days where my age and lack of hip youthful style eat at me a teeny tiny bit. So what do I do to counteract that?

Tuesday I colored my hair (there's been a rash of friends coloring their hair and I wanted in on the action - but the main reason I colored was b/c I had roots showing that were an inch long and I had gray hairs eating up the rest of the color. So I colored my hair a nice dark brown and I like it.

Thursday I got my hair cut - short again - and I like it too. Hoping the stylist was right that bringing it up will lift my face up (an illusion yes) and not focus on the chubbiest part of my chubby face.

But the best part - aside from all the nice folks I work with noticing the hair changes - was what happened this morning in the bathroom. This cute lil 20 something I work with came into the bathroom as I was walking out and she said "Hey Natae, your hair always looks so cute and stylish".

I almost fell over b/c I have never been accused of having stylish hair. I have hair and it sits on my head - end of story. And to have a trendy cute 20 something tell me that made me feel like a rock star - I'm not gonna lie.

I replied back to her in a high pitched excited fast voice, "Oh my god I love YOUR hair with it's zig zag part and I've been wanting to tell you but didn't want to seem like a freak" Too late for that I'm sure.

Back to being a Rock Star.

Slaying our Dragons

Heard this quote last night....

Fairy tales do not tell children the dragons exist. Children already know that dragons exist. Fairy tales tell children the dragons can be killed.

G.K. Chesterton

Just doing my damn job

Interesting story about how swearing at work can actually help boost morale and team spirit. See all along I've been helping to rally the troops at work.

I'm such a giver.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20071017/od_afp/britainemploymentlanguageoffbeat_071017155439

Pictures from Weekend

The new Peanut Butter Banana Elvis Reese's Cup

The view from the balcony of Steve's parents' room at the Opryland

Outside of the church

A church with a sense of humor

Had a great weekend. Other than moving into the house -we had a fabulous dinner with Steve's parents at the Old Hickory Steakhouse at the Opryland Hotel. They were there celebrating their anniversary and invited us to dinner last night and church and brunch this morning. Had an excellent brunch this afternoon as well. Opryland Hotel is pretty cool - it's HUGE and the flowers, plants and trees are amazing.

I about had a coronary though during church - it was an hour and a half long and the minister went off on so many tangents I was seriously about to flip out. We had brunch reservations and he was holding things up! Thankfully we made it and there was still food left - phew!

duh

I watched about 10 minutes of that new reality show on Vh1 - America's Most Smartest Model - and the pretty people on there were soooooo dumb that I turned to Bugg and said, "Some people really need to just take a plastic bag, put it over their heads and tie it real tight".

Home Sweet Home

We spent the first night in our house last night. It feels like home already and it feels so good to have all of our stuff moved in and most of it unpacked. Thanks to Karissa and her friend Monica we were able to get just about everything that was left in one trip yesterday afternoon. And they brought us some of the best homemade pumpkin cookies to boot! Awesome!

This morning we got up early (I'm honestly so excited about being in the house that I'm wound up pretty tight) and I swept the back porch, got some pictures hung, we ran some errands and I potted two purply red mums. LOVE IT! The weather is perfect and we've got the windows open - a nice breeze blowing - and the cat is hiding out under the couch. The cable guy made it early and hooked up us right and it's just been a great day.

Steve's parents came by for a visit and we're meeting them for dinner tonight. Our neighbors also came over to say hi - they've been married for 46 years - are quite chatty and very helpful. I'll post pictures soon.

Suck it Biatch

I know it must be hard for you to wake up and go to bed with just your miserable self day after day, night after night. I know it must be hard to know that you aren't capable of understanding, feeling or giving love. I know it must be hard to know that not only do the people around eventually figure out how hateful you are but eventually your children will figure it out too. And finally I now it must be hard to know we're so happy.

You can say all the nasty things you want, you can hide behind your Jesus, behind your lies, and behind your sick twisted sense of reality, but Karma is a bitch (a bigger one than you) and she's coming for you.

*sigh* I feel so much better now.

MMMMeerkats

Not only do I want a French Bulldog but I also wouldn't mind a Meerkat. It just about broke my heart when I watched Meerkat Manor - the one and only time I'd seen it - and the leader of the Whiskers family, Flower, was killed by a cobra. They even have a Meerkat named Axl...

I now watch it occasionally b/c it's really quite fascinating but I'm guarded and try not to get too involved b/c I decided after Flower's death that nature sucks if Flower had to die.

So darn cute

AC

I got a LOT of stuff unpacked this weekend - and even moved some more things over to the house. I almost broke my arm patting myself on the back I did such a good job ;)

I spent the rest of my afternoon watching Antichrist on the History channel (a show about the historical concept of the Antichrist). It was pretty interesting and showed several sides of the how the AC came to be and how it's viewed today.

I've pretty much decided there have been lots of Antichrist like the people already (think Hitler) and most of the historical depictions were developed and used to persecute the Jews and various other people. I also wonder if one of the present day Antichrist's is the fundamental Christian movement. And I'm not being flippant - I seriously wonder.

The show talked about a series of evangelical FICTION books about the AC - one of the books is called Left Behind. The series is evidently hugely popular and I bet it would be interesting to read as a fictional depiction - but the thing that scared me was that it gave the impression that many of the people buying these books take it to be the truth about what is going to happen with regards to the end of the world and the AC.

There are just so many ways to interpret the Bible and so many people - not Jesus people like the Apostles - but people people - who have taken it to mean what they want or need it to mean that I think it's impossible to determine if and when the AC will appear.
That's my sermon for this Sunday. Peace be with you.

80's flashback

Kim and Karissa

Eva

This somehow ended up tucked in the back of my jeans - I have NO idea how. I didn't discover it until I was out on the dance floor - I'm awesome.

Seth

Karissa & Me

Michelle & Karissa

It was Madonna, Madonna, Madonna, Nintendo belts, BIG hair, BIG earrings, and BIG fun at Decades tonight. Thanks to Seth for the free admission and to Karissa, Kim, Eva and the PS girls for a fun night.

I knew there had to be a good explanation...

I love chocolate - crave it - eat it almost daily. And now here is a tiny bit of scientific research that may prove that perhaps I'm wired to love chocolate
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071012/ap_on_he_me/diet_chocolate_craving;_ylt=AnG8zO09cJl7knPp38D4f64R.3QA

20 Years ago...

20 Years Ago Appetite for Destruction came out and my love affair began. They are about the only thing from the 80's that I still like.

Friday night there is a big 80's party at a club called Decades. Several of us from work are going and I'm going to pay tribute to the Gunners by wearing my GnR shirt, leather jacket, tacky earrings, bangle bracelets, and my too tight jeans (that's an everyday thing honestly). I'm going to tease and/or crimp my hair (try to anyway), wear too much eyeliner and way too much eye makeup and be the Rocket Queen that I am.

Please please tell me why...

When you go to a store and have a hard time finding something and you ask someone that works there where that something might be they have absolutely NO IDEA?!?!

It has happened several times in the last few shopping outings and I'm about to hurt the next person that looks at me with a blank stare and says "I don't know".

They don't say, I don't know but I'll help you find it - they just say I don't know and walk away. You are paid to know where the following items are:

1. Shake n Bake
2. Velveeta
3. Sleeping bags

You are not being paid to chat on your cell phone while you check someone out, you are not paid to like totally gossip with your awesome associates about the totally hot dude you went out with last night, you are not paid to work/walk/talk as slowly as possible when people are in line 6 deep and have dinner to make, kids to pick up, and kitties to feed. So zip the lips, pretend like you give just an ounce of sh*t about your job and do it.

Spam A LOT

I get at least 100 spam emails a day at work. This is not counting the 100+ that are filtered properly into my junk mail box. I can't tell you how $*@&ing sick I am of getting emails with the following titles or text:

1. Vagina Destroyer (Because honestly ladies - isn't that what we all want - someone to destroy our V's)


2. +1 inch, +2 inch, +3 inch, its up to you how big you want to make it! (If men really could take a pill to make it bigger can you imagine...they would probably all be walking around with a third leg)


3. The differences between men and women is that women are always ready for sex, but men need an erection. (HUH??? Seriously - women are ALWAYS ready??)


4. Soon you'll be the only one women will want! Megadik is your magic weapon! (Sounds like a superhero...Megadik is here to save the day...Destroying vagina's along the way...)


5. Fatblaster naturally assists the body in burning more calories. (Finally my prayers have been answered!)


6. Fungo bat in your pants ( I Have NO idea what the hell this means but fungo makes me laugh)


7. Dreaming of a watch cooler than the one your boss wears? (every night....every night)


8. Your penis will make more shadow than a tree. (My FAVORITE!!! It's like a fortune cookie fortune for your willie)


9. Any bigger and i would be in a circus (My other favorite - and they aren't talking about the fat lady...and sorta proves my point on number 2)

Proof

Took this picture with my camera phone - out of the Mini's sunroof. Pretty nice thing to see driving home from work on a Friday...

As God is my Witness..

Even if I do find a church I like to go to I will NEVER wear clothes from this website...I don't care if they do sew 'majestic plus size clothing'.

http://www.modestapparelchristianclothinglydiaofpurpledressescustomsewing.com

Thanks to Pam for sending this :)

Scary

Ventriloquists give me the creeps under normal circumstances but last weekend I got sucked into this kids show called Maralee Dawn and Friends and the creep factor went up by 100.

It was almost like she could go off the Mommy Dearest Deep end at any point and even the kids on the show who were part of her skits looked a little creeped out.

http://www.maraleedawn.com/

Shoes Shoes Shoes

Since I can't buy any new ones I'm getting my fix another way...
http://www.twentyonepictures.com/gallery/shoeproject/index.html

Liberty University

I guess I never paid attention - but in doing some research into the Two Rivers Baptist Church 'scandal' I came across the factoid that the pastor's daughters go to Liberty U - founded by Jerry Falwell. I was reading about the college on Wikipedia (love the Wiki) and found this interesting tidbit about the behaivor code the students have to follow:

Behavior
The university has a code of student conduct, documented in "The Liberty Way", including possible reprimands (and with the accumulation of reprimands, fines) for attending dances, violating curfew, viewing R-rated movies (on or off campus), drinking (or even associating with those drinking alcohol), smoking, viewing sexually explicit material, entering the bedroom of a member of the opposite sex (on or off campus), and participating in unauthorized petitions.

As Falwell once stated, "When we ask a faculty member be dismissed when he's teaching something wrong, our president understands and it's good to do that — because your paycheck may not be coming along next week if you don't."

And this:
Biology and fossils
Liberty University supports young-earth creationist organizations including Answers in Genesis.[citation needed] In Biology classes students are taught both evolution and creation. An additional class called History of Life investigates issues of creation and evolution.
In December 1991 Creation reported, Arlton C. Murray "excavated a dinosaur for Liberty University’s museum," which proclaimed "this dinosaur was the first of its kind in any creationist museum."

On October 23, 2006, evolutionary biologist Richard Dawkins spoke at Randolph College, where he was told that Liberty has on display dinosaur fossils dated a few thousand years old to correspond to young Earth creationism. Dawkins criticized, "If it's really true, that the museum at Liberty University has dinosaur fossils which are labeled as being 3000 years old, then that is an educational disgrace. It is debauching the whole idea of a university. And I would strongly encourage any members of Liberty University that are here to leave and go to a proper university."

Currently, the school is looking for biology teachers with "a young-earth creationist philosophy."[Furthermore, the school asserts "there is now mounting evidence that man and dinosaurs did indeed live on earth at the same time" and claims "the chances are good" that there were dinosaurs on board.

It boggles my mind quite honestly.

More Jesus

Jesus really is everywhere apparently. I heard on the news this morning that Barbie has some competition. They have now created biblical 'barbie' dolls and they are selling like hot cakes at - surprise surprise - "Wal Marts primarily in the South". I am quoting the newscaster directly.

Also while searching I found this for Halloween - a pumpkin prayer complete with instructions on how to cut the pumpkin:

“Pumpkin Prayer”

{cut off top of pumpkin}
Lord, open my mind so I can learn new things about you.

{remove innards}
Remove the things in my life that don’t please you.
Forgive the wrong things I do and help me to forgive others.

{cut open eyes}
Open my eyes to see the beauty you’ve made in the world around me.

{cut out nose}
I’m sorry for the times I’ve turned my nose at the good food you provide.

{cut out mouth}
Let everything I say please You.

{light the candle}
Lord, help me show your light to others through the things I do. Amen

Church

So recently I've been thinking a lot about God, Jesus, Church and how I fit into it all, if at all. I've had a few experiences I'd like to share. I am by no means making fun of God/Jesus...I just have issues with organized religion in general and so if you detect any sarcasm/criticism it's directed at the organized part and not G & J.

First off a few weeks ago I was feeling particularly inquisitive and I called an Episcopalian minister (I randomly picked the church from Google). I told him right off the bat that I don't think I'm necessarily a good candidate for church for a few reasons

1. I cuss
2. I think the Bible is a really good story but I have issue with the 'taking it so literally' part and I don't see me getting over that anytime soon
3. I do not believe that homosexuals are evil sinners that are going to hell and I never will
4. I want to know "when is God going to put the smack down on the Evilest woman in TN b/c she's a liar and hateful and uses being a 'christian' when it suits her needs"

He had some interesting things to say - I respected what he had to say - he had a sense of humor and I may go by someday and attend a service and/or talk with him some more.

I've also had the opportunity to visit a couple different churches in the last few months with Steve's parents. I don't mind at all b/c I am curious but Bugg likes to joke about the Church going up in flames when I walk in. As if I'm that bad :) But to be fair I think I have yet to walk into a church and not cuss - it's like a nervous tick or something. I also can't make it through a service with my family without laughing or making my brother or mother laugh.

Anyway - at our first visit to a church in KY they were making an announcement that Billy Graham's son was going to be there in a few weeks for his mission and before I knew what happened I turned to Bugg and said, 'Billy Graham is a Nazi'.

I said that is b/c someone told me that tidbit several years ago and I never forgot it b/c it upset me so much to think that he would be an anti-Semite. Now I don't know how much truth there was to that statement but my source was reliable.

This past Sunday we went to one of the larger baptist churches here in Nashville -

It was the 11:01 service - i.e. the contemporary service (the :01 is just a way to be hip and cool according to Bugg's dad). I am not a contemporary church girl. Let me tell you why...

We spent the first 20 minutes listening (while standing) to the church's 'rock' band, rock out to Jesus rock - they were basically singing 80's power ballads to Jesus. They had lights, and sound, and big screen TVs and I swear to god even a smoke machine - at least it looked like smoke was hanging around up on the lights. Many of the members were holding their hands up waving back and forth and I'm thinking - this is not Motley Crue dude - this is church. But I got my lighter out anyway and started headbanging and chanting "Jesus Rocks, Jesus Rocks" - kidding.

This next part isn't why I'm not a contemporary girl - it's just random info about the service.

We spent the next 30-35 minutes listening to the pastor/minister guy tell us all about the turmoil in the church (it's been on the news - he spent church money to pay for his daughter's wedding reception but evidently the church committee people said it was ok to use church money to pay for half of it b/c he had to invite the whole congregation b/c he was the minister and it wouldn't be right to exclude anyone).

Anyway - some of the members are ticked off about that and other things and they want him to step down so it's going for a vote next week and he was basically campaigning to keep his job. So it wasn't exactly the sermon I was looking for but it makes for good convo nonetheless.

All I have to say is - He better not be lying after he got up there and made such a deal of it - I can understand making a mistake and being human - but don't lie man - that's not cool with Jesus at all. It reminded me a lot of Jim Baker and the whole thing stank of scandal. I hope I'm wrong though b/c he sure did look super hip standing up there in his jeans and untucked button up - it helps him relate to youth you know. This paragraph pretty much sums up the reasons why I am not a fan of big churches, organized religion or contemporary services.

It sorta made me miss my FAT priest at the catholic church I went to as a kid. You don't really have to think much when you're catholic. You go in, sing, kneel, pray, listen, take communion, give your money and leave. Then you go drink beer and play bingo. But I'm not really a fan of the catholic religion either...they have their own scandals and issues. Maybe I'll start my own church/religion. But what would I call it? Nat-o-nites? Natholicsm? Narmons?

On a possibly ironic note (I'm still not sure how to use that word) while we were taking Bugg's parents to see the house we pulled up behind this big black SUV covered with bumper stickers - a couple of standouts (though they were all in the same school of thought) I Love SATAN and Jesus Loves You...Asshole.

Amen